Wow.
It has been 3 weeks since my last post. I am still here, I promise! And we are still training!
I haven't been in the best of places regarding my training over the last month. Ever since the winter weather has set in I have regarded my training sessions with obligatory indifference rather than my usual annoying energetic positivity.
Now that I don't have my shin injury to fixate on, I can fixate completely on how unfit I feel and how much everything hurts every time I train.
Plus it hasn't helped that our work life has been utterly insane. There has been so much pressure for deadlines and a general increase in workload that Rhi and I have both struggled to be excited about anything else outside of work.
But excuses aside, Rhi and I have still managed to keep up with at least the run component of our training plan and I think that is a win in itself.
Our training sessions have called for a longer run now on the weekends which, similar to my marathon anxiety, has been gradually increasing.
We have had to run 2 long runs now of 7kms which will increase by at least a km for the next few weeks.
We figured, since we have been so flat out and knackered, which has in-turn made running seemingly even harder, that we would break up our long runs to make them manageable.
I don't mean break them up like as in over a few days - I am trying to adopt a method that I read about a little while ago about purposefully giving yourself short walking-rests throughout your run. This method is supposed to be better for a beginner runner as it breaks the runs into mentally achievable distances, and it also gives your body a chance to utilise and feel the benefits of the endorphins pumping through your veins.
A lot of people will automatically have training excuses like: "If I stop I won't start again" (I used to be one of these people), and I may be the minority here, but after a quick walk to catch your breath, my entire body feels ENERGIZED.
My legs can stretch and lose their lead, my chest and breathing relaxes and my whole body buzzes with endorphins.
This little rest also gives me a chance to look around, enjoy my environment and appreciate that I am doing something that ultimately feels good.
Anyway, so we have been breaking our long runs in half. I.e 7 km run = 0.5km walking warm up, 3.5km run, 0.5km walk, 3.5km run.
This method also makes it easier to implement an "out and back" run on a new track because you know where you started, so as soon as you spy that start/finish line, you can maniacally sprint it out and (scare everyone in the vicinity) finish on a high.
It works for me ok, whatever.
Even though I haven't been writing, I have actually been thinking a lot about writing.
I have been trying to keep track of all the wins and losses and things I have learned so I can pass it on to anyone reading who might be able to learn from our mistakes.
We have been training for so long now that it has been easy to forget all the stupid mistakes we made right in the beginning and all the seemingly obviously things we overlooked.
The trouble is when decide to run a half marathon, knowing very little about running or nutrition, you can overlook a lot of stuff that would be obvious to anyone else in the sport.
Like, eating breakfast.
Like, cotton versus polyester.
Like, having the right shoes and foam rolling until your abs and arms hurt more than everything else.
Like, the combination of forgetting to bring thongs (flip flops/jandles/whatever) to shower in, wearing sweaty socks more than once and not airing out my sneakers rewarding me with an athletes foot fungus on both feet at the same time. Dont, even.
Like, running (and chafing) in shitty old bras and then finding that perfect sports bra and buying 10 of them.
Everyone will learn these things about running and about themselves during a process like this.
While I have been thinking about writing about all of this, it is true that I have also had very little motivation to do what I obsessed about over summer; little motivation to write my blog or to internet stalk every running/marathon/nutrition thought that popped into my head.
And I think I figured out why.
Because of our busy work/social lifestyles, and the usual illnesses that will plague a person over the winter months, last week was the first week that Rhi and I could train together again after almost a month, and I realized that even though there could be a bazillion reasons why I had lost my motivation to train, the biggest one was that I didn't have my running buddy.
We have both become so comfortable with our training routine and with each other that it no longer created that social-anxiety to 'rain-check a run' or decide that I would run alone instead of with Rhi.
Reality is, even though I felt determined and independent in my training at the time, I was also slowly losing that obligatory and competitive edge that I had when I knew I was accountable to the person running by my side.
The truth is, I only train hard when I have Rhi next to me, and it took me a little while to realise that.
We only have 10 weeks to go until the marathon (arrrgh!) so I know I have to suck it up, train hard and get it done. It is now or never!